Center for Spiritual ?Development

All Shall Be Well

2010-04-26T14:40:00.007-04:00

“They will hunger no more, and thirst no more; the sun will not strike them, nor any scorching heat; for the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd, and he will guide them to springs of the water of life, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.”
Revelation 7

This vision described by John in the Book of Revelation comes after the whole company of heaven is seen surrounding the throne and worshipping God. This is a big picture moment, a poetic vision that paints with large strokes across the canvas of our desire.
When we come to the book of Revelatioin we have already seen a lot. The promise of Nativity, the revelation of Christ’s ministry, the devastation of crucifixion and the joy of Resurrection. We continue to read in Acts about the ups and downs of the early church and so we approach this fantastical book with some trepidation and a tentative hope.
Pushing past the beasts and fires, we do find the words of truth and hope. We find a place to rest upon that echoes some of the earlier resting places. We know the shepherd and we know hunger.
We’ve read about springs of water with the woman at the well, and we’ve experienced the tears that come with grief.
We are ready to hear words of comfort. We are looking for a time when we will be so connected with God that we will no longer wonder about God’s presence with us. And this is what Revelation promises-a time of peace and connection and abundance.
The hunger and thirst described here are the longing that we have for God.
We will no longer need to be wandering in the desert looking for what has been found.
We will see god and we will know God.
As Julian tells us in her Showings of Divine Love:

All shall be well.
And all shall be well.
And all manner of thing shall be well'

We may well ask ourselves how this can be possible. And our questions are not without merit.
But listen at night to the gentle breeze that blows,
See the sun as it rises above the horizon in the morning,
Look into the eyes of a beloved friend or family member-

And remember that these too, are part of the world that God is giving us right now.
These glimpses into a different order of things can keep us saying with Julian that
All shall be well.
And all shall be well.
And all manner of thing shall be well'
Blessings,
Debra

We Are Set Free

2010-04-07T12:13:00.008-04:00

Let those who fear the Lord say, “His steadfast love endures forever.”

Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me in a broad place.
Psalm 118

As I sit on my porch writing this reflection I am experiencing a broad place. The air is warm enough with a light breeze. The tree is coming green and shedding petals all around me like a pink and white woven rug. The birds and bugs are singing and humming as they fly or float about their business.
This is a perfect spring day and there are signs of resurrection all around me. Having come through a surprisingly harsh winter the abundance of green is the color of hope.
All of this outdoor exuberance corresponds with the Church’s timetable of Easter this year. It is comforting when creation and liturgical seasons reflect one another.
But, the broad place is often quite difficult to perceive. Our expectations of God’s answers and the reality of God’s answers are quite often disorienting.
Many of you will know who Viktor Frankl is—the author of Man’s Search for Meaning and a concentration camp survivor.
The first part of his book contains reflections on his experience in a concentration camp. Throughout his writing about the most terrible situations human beings can encounter, there is yet a theme of spiritual strength and the human choice to search for meaning.
One day when he was working in the rock quarry he saw his wife’s face before him. He did not know if she was alive or dead but he did know that he loved her and that she loved him.
He writes: ”nothing could touch the strength of my love, my thoughts, and the image of my beloved…
Set me as a seal upon thy heart, love is as strong as death.”
To contemplate the beloved brings the strength of the beloved into us. We become that which we love.
When Frankl was released from the camp, he had lost his entire family, except his sister. He describes his first tentative steps into the countryside outside the camp in this way:
“There was no one to be seen for miles around; there was nothing but the wide earth and the larks’ jubilation and the freedom of space. I stopped, looked around, and up to the sky—and then I went down on my knees…I had but one sentence in mind—always the same:
“ I called to the Lord from my narrow prison,
and He answered me in the freedom of space.”

This is the Resurrection message to us this day, wherever we are. We are invited to offer our narrow prisons—to call out to the Lord for help, for healing, for presence.
And we will be answered with the freedom that each of us needs.
Love heals captivity.
If we are in Christ-we are free indeed!

Blessings,
Debra

The Dazzling Darkness

2010-03-25T11:18:00.003-04:00

At the Center for Spiritual Development we have spent the last few days in discernment and Ignatian prayer. As a result of silence, and pondering the movements of discernment, I have moved from a murky focus to a sense of deep assurance.
The work of discernment begins in prayer and emptying. The spiral of movement into God passes through humility and obedience before it swirls into clarity. We do not rest here, as our spiral is not static but moving. Sometimes, as in the passage from Philippians, clarity is very dark indeed:

Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death— even death on a cross.
Phil 2:5-8
In this passage, we are encouraged to let Christ be our guide on the via negativa-which is the way of emptying. Christ, through self-emptying, moves into the vision that God is holding for the world. It wasn’t enough to become human; obedience insisted on the assumption of all that humanity had made of itself, including sin and death.
We are invited to join Christ in self-emptying. We are invited to let go of everything that keeps us from clarity of God’s vision for us.
Spiritual clarity is not the same as arriving at a solution to a question. It is more like a diamond’s clarity, which is determined by clearness and lack of impurities. The most valuable stones catch the light around them and reflect it out in shimmering brightness.
The soul’s clarity glimpses the Presence without name and without words--at once unknown and yet known intimately.
Read what Dionysius (around 500 AD) wrote about this mystical encounter with God:

(The)"unchangeable mysteries of heavenly Truth lie hidden in the dazzling darkness of the secret Silence, outshining all brilliance with the intensity of their darkness."

What I am circling around here is the unchangeable nature of the living God. Spiraling or coming to the edge of mystery is the way of dazzling darkness. This is the deep paradox of the spiritual life. I seek light and I find darkness. I seek life and I am invited to give up my life. I seek Christ and I find a man hanging from a tree.
And yet, these conundrums are the very means of my salvation. The good news is that I do not have to understand them with my intellect I only need enter them with my heart wide open.
Blessings,
Debra

"Teach me to go to the country beyond words and beyond names.”
T. Merton

Rivers in the Desert

2010-03-15T11:51:00.003-04:00

Do not remember the former things, or consider the things of old. I am about to do a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.

Isaiah 43:18-19

This is a curious passage, which comes after a recitation of the works of Yahweh in the former times. The reminder of what Yahweh has done for Israel in the past is more about who Yahweh is rather than what Yahweh has done. Yahweh is redeemer.

Isaiah encourages the people to focus on God rather than circumstances, to look to redemption rather than a repeat performance of the exodus.

God is about to do a brand new thing—something, which goes beyond the expectations or even hopes of the people. The prophet tells the people to put aside what they have known so that they can experience the remarkable work of God. God is going to bring them home.

We have a tendency to be just like the people in exile, don’t we? Our hopes are so often explicit that we don’t even perceive the grace that God is pouring into our lives. We can’t let go of our attachments long enough to let our imaginations be inspired by the wonder of God.

Throughout the Old Testament, Israel moves from captivity to freedom and then back again.

This is our journey as well. We become captive to our fears and even to our hopes. We settle for a lesser vision rather than opening to God’s vision.

And yet, we too, have moments of freedom.

We are surprised by an unexpected kindness. We are moved to do something for another that we never thought possible.

Once again, we are reminded that the goal of the spiritual life is freedom, especially freedom from the false self that keeps us captive. Freedom invites us into a broad life rather than a narrow existence. Freedom in God invites us to spread our wings and ride on the winds of the Spirit.

The prophet said:

God guides the redeemed through a narrow way

into the broad road,

so that they come into the wide and broad place;

that is to say, into true freedom of the spirit,

when one has become a spirit with God.

Meister Eckhart

Blessings,

Debra

Last Words

2010-03-10T11:06:00.003-05:00

Father, Forgive Them For They Know Not What They Do.

This Lent, at St. James Parish, we are reflecting upon the last words of Christ from the Cross.
I did a meditation on the words of forgiveness, traditionally the first words in the list of seven last words.

These first words, Father forgive them; describe the deep mystical work of the Cross. Here Christ shows us with his own body what it means to reconcile the world to God.
The reconciliation of the Cross is a cosmic work. The cosmic Christ is focusing here on the whole world.
Christ on the Cross becomes the truth of God’s great desire and love for humankind.
This love stretches out from the Cross through the human arms of Jesus to embrace all of us- saints and sinners, faithful and those who do not have a faith, and all in between.

Christ begins the work of reconciliation with forgiveness. And in these last words we see that Jesus is addressing the very heart of forgiveness. Forgiving that which seems unforgivable. Jesus’ forgiveness starts with the particular and moves out to the universal. Jesus forgives the ones who are killing him, he forgives the ones who have deserted him, he forgives all those through the ages who have maligned and degraded him and his followers and he forgives us. But this divine forgiveness is not confined by a particular moment. Forgiveness begins at the Cross and moves through time and space and into the present moment-right now.
How shall we live now that we have experienced the forgiveness of Christ?
What is God inviting in you? Are you being encouraged to forgive someone that it has been hard to forgive? Is that someone even yourself?
Forgiveness allows us to let go of all that doesn’t belong to us, and make room for all that does. We, too, have been lost from time to time and it was forgiveness that helped us to be found.
I pray that you will let yourself be found this Lent by the One who is seeking you.
Blessings,
Debra

2010-02-18T09:12:00.004-05:00

Taking Nothing

A Beginning for Lent

He said to them, ‘Take nothing for your journey, no staff, nor bag, nor bread, nor money—not even an extra tunic.

Luke 9:3

How free we feel when we travel lightly! In this admonition to the disciples beginning their ministry as apostles (the ones who are sent), Jesus invites freedom in the midst of proclamation and healing.

This is not so much about the specific items we are allowed to pack on our journey; rather this is about relying on the power of God.

As we turn more and more toward the One who sends us we leave behind the old ways and turn toward the new.

For most of us those old ways were self-reliance. The new ways are God-reliance. This turning around is known as Christian detachment.

Christian detachment is not apathy or disinterest. It is caring enough to let God lead me. It is wanting closeness with the Divine above all else. It is admitting my own poverty of spirit and rejoicing in God’s abundance.

The Lenten journey we are about to begin invites us to move toward that place where we are no longer our chief resource for wisdom and direction. We are turning. We are not static. Let us turn toward God rather than away.

The journey with Christ can be more like an old-fashioned waltz than a grueling hike. There is music-the wind through the trees, the stars at night, the hum of happy activity, the blessing of relationships.

And there is invitation. God’s hand outstretched on the Cross to embrace the whole world in the dance of conversion. We are invited to this dance in so many ways, aren’t we? A request for prayer, the insistent Word of scripture, and the deep desire we feel to help others. These are our invitations to dance.

We begin our Lenten journey taking nothing so that we can experience the freedom of traveling light. Somewhere along the way, our feet begin tapping to the music of God’s kingdom, which was hidden from us before. Soon we start swaying to music and entering the dance as answer to the beautiful invitation of the Holy One.

Lent is a season for repentance, a time to see things in a new way. Traditionally, penance has been more about punishment than it has been about amendment of life. A new life is the goal of a “holy Lent.” It may be more efficacious to put on your dancing shoes than your hair shirt.

So I ask you, what is a better time to offer your heart to the One who loves you, and join in the dance?

Blessings,

Debra

We Are Known

2010-01-28T11:42:00.001-05:00

Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”
Jeremiah 1:4-5

Much of my work deals with offering possibilities for discerning God’s call. All of my work is about discernment of a God-ward direction.

The opening of Jeremiah puts that vocational discernment work into an appropriate context. The call comes to the unformed being at the soul level. God knows us.

And this forming, referred to in Jeremiah, reminds us of the first forming of human out of dust and spirit in Genesis. Each of us is formed. We are clay and we are spirit.

Dust and water become clay and when shaped by divine impulses can become resonant vessels for prayer and for prophecy.

And thus the struggle begins. When we are too much dust, we are stiff and resistant to being shaped. When life moves in and tries to shape us we crack and sometimes we break.

If we are too much water, we cannot hold a shape. Any movement into our being is met by melting and sliding away.

So discernment of the knowing hands, which are longing to create a vessel that can hold both holiness and creativity, requires both solidity and elasticity.

We must hold ourselves lightly as we listen for and discern God’s call in our life. This does not mean that we are not intently listening.

If God already knows us, we have nothing to lose. We can be ourselves. In fact, God is hoping that we will relax enough to let the beauty of the soul shimmer through both the dust and the water of our clay vessels.

In the high desert of New Mexico, up in the mountains there are deposits of micaceous clay, which is 80% mica. When these pots are formed and fired they shine like gold from the mica. This is how I begin to visualize our own clay vessels, unearthed, shaped and fired-in other words-formed by the divine Potter who is the author of our shining moments, and startlingly beautiful souls.

This is what one of the potters from New Mexico says about the pottery made from this extraordinary clay:

“Indian people view pottery not only as containers for food or other items, but also as containers and givers of life. They are beings created by the union of clay and water through the potter’s hands and thoughts, which are transferred into the vessel.” ~Felipe Ortega

As we return to our scripture from Jeremiah, we can begin to see some clear directions for our prayer and our understanding:
We are known.
We are being formed by God’s insistent presence, and
We are beautiful.
Blessings,
Debra

For more about pottery go to: http://www.janmica.com/Biography_of_a_Pot.html

2010-01-12T15:26:00.003-05:00

Praying the Hours
Compline

Come I this night to the Father
Come I this night to the Son.
Come I to the Holy Spirit powerful;
Come I this night to God.
Come I this night with Christ,
Come I with the Spirit of kindness.
Come I to Thee, Jesus.
Jesus shelter me. Amen. `-Celtic Book of Prayer

Compline - night prayer, which completes the day.

Compline is the close of the day, the completion of the hours of prayer. In monastic settings and sometimes at home as well, it is the end of speech and the beginning of silence.
The intentions of Compline are to examine the day, which has passed, and to ask for protection for the dark night, which is approaching. Both of these intentions are not about staying focused on the present moment, but they are about focus upon Christ.
Compline invites surrender to God’s time and God’s perspective. During the examen, or review of the day, we ask God to show us the events of the day from God’s perspective.
As we practice the examination we might ask questions such as, “when did I move away from you, Lord” or “when did I experience your closeness, Lord?” It is tempting to assume we know the places where we erred and to make a list of these in the confession, but God may have a different vision of the day we have spent. Compline prayer asks us to submit to a new way of looking at ourselves in relation to God’s great love.
During Compline we also ask for protection for the coming night:

Guide us waking, O Lord, and guard us sleeping;
that awake We may watch with Christ, and asleep we may rest in peace.

These Compline prayers for safety remind us that we are vulnerable when asleep. They are recited at a particular time during the day, but they point to a deep truth about the human condition, don’t they?
We are only marginally attentive, even when awake, and we need to be connected to the Divine attention. We ask for the grace to watch with Christ, to stay awake, when we are meant to be awake, and to sleep when we are meant to sleep.
The prayers for Compline complete our cycle of hours not just because they come at the end of the day, but because they restate the deep longing of all our prayer—

To be with Christ in wakefulness and in sleep.
To be with Christ in life and in death.
To be with Christ.

Blessings,
Debra

2010-01-05T12:20:00.002-05:00

Praying the Hours
Vespers
I call upon you, O Lord; come quickly to me;
Give ear to my voice when I call to you.
Let my prayer be counted as incense before you,
And the lifting up of my hands as an evening sacrifice.
Psalm 141
Vigils – beginning some time during the early hours while it is still dark;
Lauds – Morning Prayer, at daybreak;
Terce – mid-morning prayer, around 9 am;
Sext - midday prayer, around noon; we know this as noonday prayer.
None – mid-afternoon prayer, around 3 p.m;
Vespers – evening prayer, ideally at sunset; also known as evensong.
Compline - night prayer, which completes the day.

Vespers is one of the two great offices of the day, morning and evening prayer. It is a beautiful time of day to remember that God is walking with me through work, rest and prayer. Candles are lit and in our own service for Evening Prayer we say together the Phos Hilaron or O Gracious Light:

O gracious light,
pure brightness of the everliving Father in heaven,
O Jesus Christ, holy and blessed!

Now as we come to the setting of the sun,
And our eyes behold the vesper light,
We sing your praises, O God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

You are worthy at all times to be praised by happy voices,
O Son of God, O Giver of Life,
And to be glorified through all the worlds.
In Theology and Spirit this week we are studying the posture of blessing-God’s blessing to us and our blessing to God. This is more than a prayer posture; it is an attitude of living. Blessings are given to encourage and support the full life of the blessed one. Praises and blessings go hand in hand, so as we come to the end of the day, regardless of the happenings of the day, we have an opportunity to praise God and to bathe in the vesper light.
During the 4th Century a light was kept burning near the empty tomb of Christ to symbolize the light of Jesus. At the time of vespers a candle lit from the lamp was brought forth and used to light the candles for the evening service. In this way worshippers were reminded of the flame of the Risen Lord.
Each of the hours of prayer points to Christ. Vespers reminds us that as we face the long darkness of night, the light of Christ illuminates our way. If we are consistent in vesper prayers we will notice that in other darknesses, the Christ light shows for us as well.

While the earth and the sky move into night, our evening prayer rises like smoke from incense, to touch the clouds and point the way to the stars. These brilliant lights become the sky’s vesper candles, lit to celebrate the risen Lord.
Blessings,
Debra

2009-12-31T09:45:00.000-05:00

A Blessing for the New Year

As I’ve gone about my daily errands this week, it seems that every person has said Happy New Year to me. And I’ve been wondering if they mean one day or if they are talking about the entirety of 2010. Without even being psychic I can say with certainty that I will not be happy each day of the year, neither will I be sad. What I can know is that I will try, in as much as it’s up to me, to be at peace with my neighbor and praying into God’s presence.
There is a lovely prayer service in the Celtic Book of Prayer that ritualizes this intention to live in Christ and with Christ as the New Year begins.
It starts with an opening door:

Enter, Lord Christ—
We have joy in Your coming.
(The prayer goes on)
You have given us life
And we welcome Your coming.
Be with us, Lord,
We have joy, we have joy.
This year is a new year,
The opening door.
Be with us Lord,
We have joy, we have joy.

Joy is a quality of connection with God. It doesn’t mean that I feel happy or that I have no sorrows, what it does mean is that I am putting myself at that opening door waiting for Christ to come in.
So this new year, let us stand at the door that is opening for us and wait as long as we need to, for Christ to enter our hearts.
A renewed and renewing covenant with God in Christ is the best New Year’s resolution that I can imagine.
Blessings to you,
Debra

Midweek meditation Dec 2, 2009

2009-12-18T11:27:00.002-05:00

Praying the Hours

Terce

When the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, Whom the Father will send in My name, has come, He shall teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I have said unto you.
--John 14

This week we look at the third hour of prayer known as terce.

Vigils – beginning some time during the early hours while it is still dark;
Lauds – Morning Prayer, at daybreak;
Terce – mid-morning prayer, around 9 am;
Sext - midday prayer, around noon; we know this as noonday prayer.
None – mid-afternoon prayer, around 3 p.m;
Vespers – evening prayer, ideally at sunset; also known as evensong.
Compline - night prayer, which completes the day.

The third hour, around 9 am, is the hour for welcoming the Holy Spirit. It is the hour of fire; the sun is risen and is warming the earth. Traditionally, it is the hour of Christ’s condemnation as well as the hour of the Holy Spirit’s descent upon the gathered community at Pentecost.
How do the condemnation of Christ and the coming of the Holy Spirit in fire relate to one another? The echo of condemnation sounds with each footfall toward the cross. The Way of the Cross begins with the image of the silent Jesus before Pilate. Shouts from the crowd, “Crucify Him!” only add to the emptiness of words in this scene. Jesus’ condemnation provokes silence, but the death of Jesus is met with lightening and rending of the Temple curtain. This lightening shatters the sky and becomes the spark for the tongues of flame at Pentecost.

“Make ready for the Face that speaks like lightening,
Uttering the new name of your exultation
Deep in the vitals of your soul.
Make ready for the Christ,
Whose smile, like lightening,
Sets free the song of everlasting glory.”
-Thomas Merton

In monasteries the third hour of prayer is often the hour of the Eucharistic celebration.
Fr. Huntington, founder of Holy Cross Monastery, reminds us that, "The whole love of the passion burns in every Eucharist, and we...are to be kindled with that love.”

Terce then is the hour of prayer in which we are invited to see the Face of Christ illuminated in the Eucharistic vessels, even as we feel the fire of His great love for us as we come to the table.
Whether or not we are able to join each other at the Eucharistic table for the third hour of prayer, we can celebrate the gift of the Spirit and remember the flames of Pentecost and the fire of the Passion of Christ.

Blessings,
Debra